Today, we struggle to even write this blog, as we believe that love is love and every partnership should be valued, and therefore, we don’t really see the necessity in detailing how to plan LGBTQ weddings, because to us there is no difference in a gay wedding and a straight wedding. So, before we begin this post, we want to clarify that these are just suggestions for partners who want some advice into where to start their planning.
Did you know that one-third of all LGBTQ couples say planning their wedding was either “difficult” or “stressful.” and in fact, only two percent of straight couples and seven percent of gay couples say theirs will fall into the “traditional” category? The number one reason that people say they are having trouble planning a wedding is because they have not thought through what to include in their ceremony or reception.
Traditional weddings have come to represent the “end goal” for many couples. However, as more LGBTQ couples are planning to say, “I Do,” in their own way- throwing glitter all over their big day, the often-traditional wedding which is typically associated with a white gown, church wedding ceremonies, and flower girl dresses are long gone. Therefore, it is essential to know that although “traditional weddings” have long been the “norm,” there are many alternatives.
Although most LGBTQ weddings are simply a shift in aesthetic aspects, there are a few important things to note; therefore, below, we aim to breakdown the basics when planning your own fabulous day.
So, let’s start at the beginning with those plentiful bridal shows:
I’m sure you’ve seen plenty of ads for bridal shows and want to check out the vendors. However, being in an LGBTQ relationship can often feel stressful and make you feel unsure of where to begin. Here is what I think you should consider. Firstly, you need to remember that love is love. Whether those bridal shows are targeted towards brides and groom relationships, they are alterable for any couple. In theory, you could research LGBTQ specific wedding expo’s; however, those won’t be as plentiful, and most companies (unfortunately not all) will be happy to make your day incredible for you and your partner. So, don’t be afraid to attend and ask lots of questions! The best advice is to get information and samples from every company possible!
Next up, the ceremony:
Although queer relationships and religious institutions have long been pitted against one another, the last decade has shown progress towards equality, and some churches and religions have come to thankfully embrace LGBTQ weddings. If you are in the Kansas City area, please contact us today, as we would be so delighted to be a part of your incredibly special day.
Okay, now onto those often time consuming and pesky marriage licenses:
This part of the process can be the least amount of fun, especially since each state requires a marriage license, with each having their own requirements. Before you begin this process, please look into your states’ specific requirements, so there are no surprises when you apply. Here’s the link for information and requirements here in Kansas City http://www.cityapplications.com/marriage-licenses/MO-Missouri/mrg-KansasCity.html.
The last non-aesthetic aspect of LGBTQ weddings is the topic of the last name:
Although the typical marriage resorted to the woman taking the man’s last name, those traditions have drastically changed in the 21st century. Today, many couples keep their names as a symbol of equality within their relationships. Although this can seem like a difficult decision, keep in mind that the options are limited. Your first option is to do nothing, (each partner keeps their own last name). This has become a popular option in straight and queer relationships for those who want to show independence in their relationship. Another option is to hyphenate the two last names. This option is most common for relationships who are wanting to show equality in their relationship. Your third option is to go the traditional route of 1’s most taking the name of the other. The fourth and last option is to create a new name, combining the two last names. Regardless of which route you choose to take, please again, make sure that you check your state laws.
The last thing we want to mention is that there is no right or wrong way to plan your perfect day. Please get in touch with us today at KCweddings2go so we can assist you in making your day extra special.